Where is the best and safest seat?

Another “duh” question! But there are merits to that so I can say that this question is not dumbest. Its just… dumb hehe! I have touched about this topic over at this article when someone asked about front and back seats. But let us continue on “best” and “safest” seats!

The “Best”
That of course is relative. Best seat in relation to what?

Views? Then of course those would be the window seats. If you have that camera ever ready to snap shots of the things you see as your airplane rolls or flies, you don’t’ want a window seat by the wings. I also noticed that front window seats are not that great for camera wielding passengers. Why? Because a plane lifts its nose early during take-off. And at landings, it’s the last part to touch the ground. It mostly tilts towards the sky. So, in general, window seats at the back of the plane are better for you shutterbugs out there yearning to take aerial shots of our dear Pilipinas! Note: if you are flying on a bi-class flight (that means there are two classes of service), you won’t like it if you are seated at the business class section of the plane since it is way up front. So save on the pesosesoses by flying economy!

Noise? Ah we also covered a bit on this over at the discussion on front and back. But first you need to categorize what kind of noise you are trying to avoid. Engine noise? Wheh?! Di nga?! All passenger airplanes in the world are supposed to have been tested for that. Meaning, whatever noise they produce, it should be bearable to the normal human ear. Anyway, many frequent passengers (and doctors, and experts) say it is generally better out front. I say.. “BS”! Why? Because the front area is where passengers with kids are usually seated (from rows 2 to 5) and when one of them brats start throwing a tantrum with all the shrieking and waling, I would rather be at the very last row! I also consider unbearable noise those women with very high-pitched voices who chat very loudly. Try them for a co-passenger in one of the very early morning flights. Awhrrrr!

Space?
Ah I am a fan of this… and you of course know where those are, right? Those are the front-most seats, and seats beside the emergency exits. Beware of the window seat near the aircraft doors. They (the doors, I mean) mostly have smaller glass windows so if you are fond of looking outside, any seat of this type is ugly. Plus, for bigger planes, your legs will be a bit constrained by that protruding thing at the base of the door. That’s the casing of the plane’s emergency shute(slide). So double ugly for the Melanie Margquez (thanks god for my long legged) folks! Best would be the next seat or the aisle seat. And for you perverts out there, on smaller planes like the 737s and the A320s, these front aisle seats are nearest the stewardesses during take off and landing. You can even start extending your legs to hers until someone reprimands you hehehe!

I have more on this “space” topic. There are unnoticed little things in an aircraft that you might want to consider. Like? The armrests on seats that are not by the exit rows are retractable. Meaning you can lift them up to fit in between the backrests! The advantages? Well, if no one is seated beside you, you can lift that and claim an extra seat for a space. If it’s the whole row, then you can even lie down (I consider that barriotic, btw). If you’re traveling with the labbiedabs too, retract the armrest for an unhampered kiskisan of your arms and torsos. Gosh! Plus, when the little tyke at the back seems to be too makulit by trying to play hide and seek with you with some bit of extending his arms in between the seats, retract the same armrest and voila, the little dear won’t be able to reach you hehe. Lastly, be aware that the backrests of seats by the wingside emergency exits cannot be reclined. Ditto the seats at the very last row because they already touch the wall of the lavatory or galley!

The “Safest”
Eh! Really? Why? Gusto mo ikaw lang mabuhay in case something happens? Ganun?! Get this into your brain… all aircraft seats are safety-tested and approved before being fitted to be called seats. And all seat locations are part of the total ‘fitness’ of an aircraft. So, in general, any seat is relatively just as safe as the other. Well okay, we cannot avoid the many who dwell on negative things. Yeah, like you! No no no, don’t look elsewhere… I mean you, yes you hahaha! By statistics of fatal accidents, it is coming out that many survivors come from the middle and back portions. Yep, those seats that you hate because you always like to sit up front.

Some investigations reveal that some survivors were lucky because their plane nose-dived, so that the people up front were the first to be crushed. Ala eh… that is if the plane you are riding would nose dive! What if it was able to glide a while then slam or touch ground with the rear portion first as should be? Then you at the back would be unlucky! Kawawa ka hehe! So, is it probably better if you sit by the wing area? so that the sturdy landing gears (yep, the tires, the wheels, the gulong ng palad) and its shafts/housing can add extra protection like bull bars do in a racecar? Hmm probably! Just pray your plane does not burst into flames because that is the very area (wings) where most of the fuel is kept. Then you’ll fry to obliteration ahead of everyone hahaha!

Now, ngayon... have you found the “safest” seat yet? I have a very good proposal:

Plant it deep into your mind, heart and soul that you are more susceptible to vanishing from earth many hundreds of times more, probably with your house catching fire while you are asleep, than you being in a plane crash. Tandaan mo yan!

Next question please?!!! Hehehe!