My Jordan Jetty Port To Balaan Bukid Saga

Okay folks, despite the misgivings as told in the previous story, I was on to my "day-tour of Guimaras". As agreed with the clerk at that bogus tourism information center, my tour would take somewhat of a counter-clockwise run starting with Balaan Bukid Shrine, winding to end at the Raymen Beach Resort.

My first "wonderful sight" while on tour: Guimaras Strait with a view of Iloilo City out on the horizon!

But that was actually not the point why I took that picture. I was more on trying to catch the beach on foreground of photo, as I was wondering how this place could have looked like when it was still clean.

What a start, right? You might say I'm being too negative. Ah, in fact I was, and I still am as I write this. DAHIL, I was scammed by a bogus tourist information office, inside a government building at the port.

Don't worry folks, I'll be pragmatic about tourist sights. But if I cannot be objective, I'll be realistic!

Then we passed by the "real" Port Of Jordan (a.k.a. RORO Wharf). This one is expansive!

So what was it that I arrived at? The Jordan Guimaras Jetty Port with a fake tourist information office. People in and around that office are not there to help, assist or inform visitors. They are there to SELL mediocre services that Guimarasnons should be ashamed of. Tindahan ang bwakang opisina na iyon!

No wonder the "Kojak" was shouting on top of his lungs, that visitors pass through their "information office" (para maka-benta sila), and no wonder that in a whole boatload, tatlo lang kaming nabiktima!

Lesson learned: go with the flow - meaning go where most people go: out to the streets.

Eh I didn't do my homework before going to Guimaras. I was hoping to just get information from their supposed to be helpful tourist information center. Tindahan pala ng sapilitang barbaric tour package.

To the Jordan LGU: please review your public service mandates. A tourism office is not a tindahan. You are supposed to just help those who want to do tourist-related businesses, not do the business itself!

At sana man lang maayos ang serbisyo. Read on, for you to find out what I am saying!

Anyway, I still find fun even in distress. Like this: I was taking a picture of their vast RORO Port...

All of a sudden that jejemon appeared running from one side of the gate to the other. He even smiled hehehe! In fairness, maybe he thought I was photographing him. Nge! Sige na, walang basagan ng trip!

And I saw my first destination... a hill at the other end of the bay [see below].

Balaan Bukid is at that promontory hill that can be seen as your boat approaches Jordan Jetty Port.

That's the place I said I had to read online. It can actually be seen even as far back as the Ortiz Wharf.

And at this point, I caught my self taking deeper breaths of relaxation or maybe "sighs of relief" that I was already away from the hoodlums of this island's information center! I was now touring the island.

However, not long after, I had to even instinctively cover my nose...

In my mind I was saying "OMG ano yan? A touristy island and they throw their garbage on the beach"?

It's not as if just a little portion or a corner of the beach that teems with rubbish. It's the entire strip!

I asked the driver if this was really a dump site. The reply was a very elucidative educational... SHRUG!

Bwiset na...! Yun ba ang "our driver will also be your tour guide"?

My heart was starting to sink again. This wasn't the Guimaras that I've seen in the mid 1990s. Anyway, I tried to entertain myself by reflecting at the barangay's name - Hoskyn. It sounds like a foreign name!

And then we approached this corner, that at least, painted a wicked smile on my face...

A public market is on the right, but this is no ordinary Y-intersection... this is also a basketball court!

Here's a clearer view of what I mean above...

The road bends leftwards, and that basketball post is in the very middle of that curving pavement. At least tricycles, even sedans and the rickety multicab I was riding, could fit on either side of that goal.

Ambot na lang... kasakit sa agtang ah! And mind you, the blue marker that says Balaan Bukid Shrine is misplaced therefore misleading. You would think the shrine is somewhere in this area, right? Well, it's still very far, about 1km up a hill. Maglagay man lang sana sila ng arrow pointing left! Mahirap ba yun?

A few meters forward from that 'basketball corner' this one at least fascinated me...

Driver stopped and talked to some guys by the roadside without getting off the vehicle. So, I had time to appreciate this animal! Aside from it looked healthy, that orange color on its hide looks interesting!

Shortly thereafter, we reached this pathetic-looking shack.... I was thankful it was closed!

You can't blame me. I think I instantly acquired a phobia on information centers. I was just had by the tourist information center at Jordan Jetty Port, remember? Niloko ako and it will not be easy to forget!

Anyway, not far onwards from that information center is a sarisari store where we stopped, and driver told me that all vehicles can only make it this far, so I have to walk up to the shrine like all visitors do.

I asked if he won't accompany me since he was my tour guide too. He reasoned that there was no one to watch over his vehicle, so he cannot go with me, but he will instead wait for my return to this spot.

I hesitated for a moment, but went for it alone anyway - my teeth gritting in anger.

Why was I hesitant to go alone? Well, that ascending dirt path is a forest, I wouldn't know if snakes or wild animals could attack me, OR if there were criminals lurking in the thickets to victimize me, di ba?

Malay ko ba, eh hindi naman ako taga-dito, kaya nga "tourist" eh. And it was my first time hearing and going-up to this grotto na ipinagmamalaki ng Guimaras. When I was last here in 1996 puro beaches at mangga plantations ng kaibigan ko ang inatupag namin - walang ganitong bundok na walang kalsada.

Why was I angry? Because at the f***n information center that booked me this tour, I asked for a tour guide and the faggot said my driver would already be my tour guide. Diin ang lilintian nga tourguide?

Tour guides annotate things and places anywhere you go, right? Therefore tour guides don't leave you alone, right? That bading even had the nerve to tell me I saved a lot in tour guiding fees. 'Tangina nya!

Eh did I come to save on tour guiding fees? The fact I booked a vehicle alone, means may pera naman ako, di ba? Hindi naman ako pumunta sa kanila begging for cheapness -ni hindi nga ako tumawad eh.

Kung naka-swerte man ang Jordan LGU sa wallet ko, the least they could've given was proper service.

Let's continue, kahit nanginginig ang kalamnan ko sa galit while telling this horrible experience.

The driver's only advise was "just follow the dirt path and the stations of the cross". This is the first...

In my mind I was protesting that I did not come to this place to do the stations of the cross, eh end of next month pa ang holy week! I just wanted to see the shrine and the view of Iloilo City from up there.

This is somewhere near the 5th station of the cross...

Imagine yourself walking alone going up a mountain in this kind of environment. Kahaladlok ay. Duu!

Station seven... this means I was only halfway going up to my destination...

Look at the road at left... that is where I walked... alone... no people, no nothing... just plain eeriness!

Then somewhere near station 8, I saw these three red tricycles...

I thought all vehicles stop before the 1st station? Te ano 'na? Not just one but three! And I thought the faggot said trikes cannot climb these hills - when in fact, it was my dying multicab that couldn't. Yodi!

Onwards, I walked again, tired, thirsty and angry, I did not have water, no stores in this wilderness...

The driver told me to leave my backpack where it was inside his multicab, as he'd be there to watch it.

There was water on the side pocket. But I didn't bring it, since no one told me I would need it; no one told me this walk (that he said was "dyan lang") was a kilometer (or more) going uphill; that there are no stores nor residences along the way (for emergencies). At nasan ang bwaka ng inang tourguide ko?

Stations of the cross? This was like a walk to, and in, hell. Juice ko, pataas pala ang impyerno?!

The climb was getting steeper. There are a few steps, at least. And that is the 14th station up there...

Not that I didn't notice, the views started getting wow at this height. But I was dying tired and thirsty.

And there it is, the chapel... I even had a hard time deciphering where I should pass going up there!

If I had a guide, he could have told me that the easier way was to skirt around the bushes where there is no clear path, just bushes, vines and trees. Otherwise, you clamber up those ruins of a wall as I did!

Lo and behold.., reaching the chapel grounds, I saw there was this group of 6 or 7 tourists...

They were the passengers of the 3 red tricycles I saw near Station 8. When I saw them, one was loudly describing that chapel, and pointing to/describing Iloilo landmarks that can be seen from this hill. He was THE tour guide AND one of the tricycle drivers. You could just imagine.., I was angry all over again!

But anger was not even my primary concern at that time...

I was literally dying of thirst, I was too weak to move any further. So, I asked if anyone of them had an extra bottle of water, or I can take any opened bottle they have, and willing to pay for it just to have a sip. The trike driver (cum tour guide) was holding his unopened bottle and immediately gave it to me.

As I sat under a tree to recover, and the group was about to go, the trike driver even asked me if I was fine as I would be alone on this hill when they leave. I said 'no problem' and I can manage on my own.

Let me describe what I saw at this 'shrine' on my NEXT entry.

But, for clarity, so this won't happen to you, let me summarize facts of my encounters and learnings on this hellish trip to a holy mountain! Yes, Balaan means Holy and Bukid in the Visayas is Mountain:

01. There is NO tourist information center or office at the Jordan Guimaras Jetty Port, so don't bother looking for one, as you would do in Ormoc upon the fastcraft arrival. Walang ganun in Jordan, even if it is a nice big PUBLIC building that meets you - and even if some hoodlums keep hollering that you need to pass by that information office - which is A HOAX - and Guimaras officials surely know of that.

02. If you need information, just ask around or read everything you can search-for online. Don't go to that "tourist information office" inside the government building at the Jordan jetty port. IT'S A FAKE. It is actually a tour operator (that we don't know yet if legal, since they do not display a name). Besides, granting (without accepting) that they are indeed a travel agency, they provide not only poor service, but offer fraudulent information - but/and GUIMARAS OFFICIALS SURELY KNOW ABOUT IT.

03. Just follow other passengers na lang kasi. No one goes to that FAKE "tourist information office".

04. A Jeep is not a Multicab. Do not ride to the Balaang Bukid if it is a Multicab.

05. Tricycles can climb higher up that hill. They're available out on the street near the public market or even any of the streets in the town of Jordan. Never ask that FAKE tourist information office. They are dangerously out to sell poor services by giving you FAKE information. Imagine, they even told me it is also with them that I must book a resort, and all transport needs in Jordan are centralized with them!

*Why did I believe them? Because they're (supposedly) a tourist information office in a gov't building!

Let's go to the NEXT story.

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